Sarmila Bose the Culprit

Since it is National Women’s Day, I would like to share something with all of you guys.  I want to talk about a very educated woman who is in denial of a specific genocide that took place in Bangladesh.  With the amount of accurate and valued information from the time the war in 71 started to the respected writers who have written books of the factual incidents, along with sharp statistics, nobody can bend history.

If you're not familiar with the whole 1971 scene in Bangladesh then let me inform you.  You can relate it to Nanjing, Indonesia, or Rwanda.  This actually outnumbers Rwanda and Indonesia.

Before the independence of our motherland in '71, it was a part of Pakistan, known as East Pakistan.  During the fight for liberation and our mother language (Bangla), a mass number of young students, civilians, and soldiers died.  Many were killed grotesquely, most of which were women; women of all ages who were Bangladeshis and Refugees from India. 

Let’s go into further detail.  The genocide was taken place in East Pakistan (Bangladesh) by the Pakistani Army starting from March to December 1971.  The things that happened within these 9 months to the innocent East Pakistani Civilians resulted in a death toll going from 300,000 to 3,000,000 people.  Many men were taken by Pakistani soldiers and shot on the spot.  Many of you have respected family members who had been through this.  Out of the total, 200,000 to 400,000 women were RAPED.

The Story of Aryan part 2

2 years later. . .

Aryan has started his new job last year. Still not married.

After work, he does his daily routine of working out to stay fit and impress the girls.

"The chics always go for the bad guys."  Poor Aryan.

Indian drama serials - the new drug

The evil jealous sister-in-law, the possesive mother-in-law, the cheating husband, the really dumb but tolerant wife...and it goes on and on and on.  Really plays with a person's emotions for nothing.

This whole drama serial business is just as popular and serious of a matter as drug addiction.   

Lets talk about the boss behind this sweet disaster, Ekta Kapoor.  She produces a countless number of dramas that you will come across while you are flipping through the musical and colorful indian channels.  Usually after 17:00 it all begins.  One serial after another.  The wives and mommies take some time out from their long tiring day and give their full attention to it.  The best part is that all of these never-ending dramas have just about the same story.  The slightly different beginning with the same old climax, and the same freakin ending.  Most of them at least.  Let's not forget the classic overdramatic, noisy sound effects (which are also the same) accompanied with the classic over-exaggerated look of betrayel on each character's dumbfounded face (again, lacking originality) that tend to slow the storyline down day after day.

To sum it all up, it's a big blob of crap, which the audience LOVE.   

The Story of Aryan part 1

This is Aryan.  He graduated engineering school today.  Now he's got nothing to worry about.

Time to move back in.

Art of the Day - Women who gossip and the Woman who tries to survive

This is during a party when 2 well-dressed rich women gossip about whats going on around them.  Who divorced who, who got pregnant with who, which girl or guy dressed the worse, who got bankrupt...and so on.   They care about others way too much.

Here is a woman hasn't eaten anything for 4 days.  Her child has a high fever and her husband is dieing.  The daughter behind her has only one single dress to wear which is almost tearing.  The woman only wants to survive.  More than herself, she wants her kids to survive. She cares about her family.

Desis and their Expected Body Type

When my mom first got married, she was quite young, 18, the average age when most bengali girls got married in the 80s.  She was a beautiful woman and i wish i had those same characteristics of her's that she carried. She was 5'5 and slim.  Slim. 

Twenty years ago, most bengali women hated slim.  They never used skinny in a positive sense.  Instead of complimenting, people would just think she starved herself, resulting of her having no meat. 

When she was pregnant with me, she obviously had to gain weight.  However, right after she had me, at the age of 19, her tummy went back to normal.  Flat and plane.  She went back to her normal skinny self and oh how people despised that.  My mother got critisized day and night for the way she looked.  The look that every women tried to have in the western countries. 

When i turned 2, we left Dhaka and moved to the states.  When mom started working, she got a whole different outlook out of the people there.  The Americans would say, "you are so lucky to be so fit even after having a child!"  All her married life she kept hearing how ugly she was for her "boney-ness" and now it was all upside down.

Bengalis hate skinny.  I my mother was not exposed to all the different perspectives people have on looks, she would have eventually thought the same - that skinny=ugly. 

Sometimes even now in parties, she would get the classic bengali line "bhabi, you got even skinnier.  Is your health ok?"   It's fine if a close friend says, because that means she honestly cares about her, but this comes from random people.

I've also heard, in the same parties, critisizm of women with a little extra.  Except that one is said behind the back.  "Have you seen her size? She can't even move with her fat!"
I don't think it matters how a person's body shape is.  There are better things to do than critisize a person's body the entire time.  Seriously, there are so many different kinds of people in this world.  There is no same ideal woman.  Everybody has a different picture of how a beautiful woman should be.

Now comes my story.

My whole entire life, I have recieved 80% negative critisizm of my body, the other 15% never really said anything (because they find it least important to discuss), and the remaining 5% compliments came from my family members, closest friends, and strangers.  Yes, i actually thought about all of the percentages and they are nearly accurate.

So much pressure.
I had very low self-esteem from all the judgements i got.  So there were times when i ate so much, but i never gained a single pound.  Not until i hit 23.  After getting married, the pounds (kgs) started to add on.  I was happy at first, until I realized i needed a completely new wardrobe.

Now i get people warning me about gaining weight.  They say i better watch out.

People in Sweden are so thin, that suddenly i am having trouble fitting in.

When i go to Bangladesh, everyone will tell me how i shouldn't gain anymore weight because it will make me look fat in comparison to my height.  What the hell.  I thought they liked "healthy" people. 

I will go insane one day from thinking of what the ideal body type is in this world.  So it's better for women to just be comfortable with the way they are.  Beauty comes in different shapes and sizes.

We should all think of the big picture of life instead of thin waist, big ass, large breasts, and perfect face.

 One day, we will all become old with our wrinkly skin sagging and eyes getting smaller, height getting shorter, bones rotting... body will always change.  What will remain the same is our soul.